Lessons from My Mom

My mom taught me many things in my life and in reflecting on her life and what she left me with, I came up with four things that really encompass the way she lived. She had a couple of things she said to me regularly and they were “this too shall pass”, and “the laundry will be waiting for you when you get back”, I think this pretty much says what her life was about, but let me start at the beginning…

Even though my mom said these things, she really taught me by her actions and that is, of course, the best way to teach anything.

Family is Everything…

Growing up, we always had meals together…not just dinner. We had breakfast every morning. Sometimes it was cereal, but most mornings, it was grits, eggs, toast or oatmeal…and in the spring and summer, there were always strawberries, freshly sliced tomatoes or canteloupe (with salt and pepper of course). When we were all at home for lunch, she made tuna salad or grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup and we always had dinner together. As we got older and got married, she made Sunday lunch after church every Sunday for many years. It was a time for all of us to be together and we made many great memories as a family at those Sunday lunches.

My mom loved the sun and family beach trips were her favorite thing. We would spend all day at the beach and go to bed tired and happy. In the winter when it snowed, she would get us all dressed up warmly and we would take the sleds and go to the park and sled until we were too cold to stand it anymore. She always took a Hershey bar for energy and when we got back, we had hot chocolate.

Holidays were always so much fun with special foods and lots of decorations…she loved to try new recipes and sometimes they were amazing and sometimes, we got a good laugh, but that was a memory too. On Christmas Eve, she always gave everyone a special to them gift at dinner and put so much thought into each one. On Easter, she made sure the Easter Bunny filled our hand painted (by her) Easter baskets with just the right things.

These are just a few examples, but you get the point. She took the time to make things special. As our children got older, she created traditions with them as well and they have those to treasure.

This too shall pass…

When things were hard, this is what she always told me and now, I say it to myself as a reminder that nothing lasts forever, even the hard things. Repeating “this too shall pass has gotten me through many difficult situations in my life. Her words will stay with me as a reminder of her impact on my life.

My nephew Jacob and my daughter Rebecca with my mom

The laundry will be waiting for you…

Whenever I was thinking of not doing something because I had too much to do, she always reminded me that “the laundry would be waiting for me when I got back”. In other words, don’t miss out on life because you need to do laundry or vacuum the house.

She really lived by these words, although somehow she always managed to get the laundry done (eventually) and the house always looked good. She never turned down an opportunity to do something fun. She went on countless trips (business for my husband) with us to help out with the girls and they had a blast. She also went on several trips to Europe with us and never ever complained about being tired, although I’m sure she was at times! She loved to have new experiences and she loved people.

My daughters Lauren & Sarah with my mom

Never Stop Learning…

My mom was always artistic. Early in her life she took up oil painting and was very good…her paintings hung on the walls of our home and I can still see them in my mind. When we were little, she made some of our clothes, she took up decopauge, tole painting, quilting and did countless crafts. She was always trying something new and never bored. She took cooking classes with me and we even catered weddings together! She had endless energy and was always interested in learning.

She was our girl scout leader and youth leader. She was very active in church and always involved with her garden club. I didn’t realize just how busy she stayed when I was younger, but, now as an adult, I don’t know how she did it all!

My mother’s life taught me in many ways how to be a mother, and how to be in the world. I am more like her than I ever realized and that is something I’m proud of!

Alzheimer’s took my mother long before she was physically gone, but she lived a full life and was present for us. We’ve missed her for a while, but the memories we made with her will live on. I’m sure we’ll have many family times in the future when we we’re all together and we talk about Nonnie and her life!