A Guiding Principle for Living a Beautiful Life
Yesterday reminded me how deeply I care about how my time is spent.
It began with a phone call I had been putting off…one of those tasks you know will take longer than it should. Before the holidays, I switched our phone service under less-than-ideal circumstances. A stranger sitting in my living room for two hours, paperwork I didn’t fully understand, the busy season distracting me from sorting it all out as I should have. As you probably guessed, it led to problems later.
Yesterday afternoon, I finally called AT&T customer service (again) because one of our new phones has no service. The call went nowhere. I got frustrated. I wasted hours. And today, I’ll have to go into the store to resolve it.
That experience stopped me short.
Not because life went wrong…life will be life, but because of how I handled it. I had the call on speaker, a messy kitchen in front of me, and the thought that I could clean while I talked. I was multitasking in an effort to be efficient. Instead, I stood in bad overhead lighting (getting a lamp today), surrounded by clutter, growing more irritated every second.
It felt anything but beautiful.
And that’s what stayed with me as I went to bed last night.
Beauty isn’t just what we see. It’s how something feels…it’s an attitude, a mindset and a way of moving through the day. It’s thinking ahead, acting intentionally and respecting your own time and energy. Beauty is about more than flowers on the table or using the good china, it’s about how we allow life to meet us.
That realization led me to articulate something I’ve been living toward for a while now…a guiding principle that helps me choose more carefully.
Beauty is a practice of attention.
Tending to how things look and feel isn’t vanity; it’s respect…for my life, for my body and for the moment.
I choose presence over performance.
Alignment over approval.
Depth over noise.
When life is lived this way, beauty becomes a filter (this thought gives me chills). It draws in what is aligned and quietly releases what is not. I let resonance do the work. I express myself honestly. I don’t explain myself to be understood. I don’t make myself smaller to fit.
This is the standard I want to live by…attentive, embodied, and deliberate with what I allow close.
Days like this will still happen, but having a guiding principle makes them easier to meet with grace.
For years, I kept an Emerson quote on my bedside table and it seems very fitting for the day I had yesterday…
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
//Ann Taylor Leopard Coat (under $100 and the cutest coat)//J. Crew Black Sweater Pants (I love love these pants)//Stuart Weitzman Kitten Heel Booties//Tory Burch Red Bag (similar here)//
Of course, beauty is also visual and how we dress on a daily basis matters. One thing I’ve noticed through the Style Challenge I’m doing with you…is how differently I feel, and how differently I’m treated when I get dressed with intention, even for a day of errands. When I take the time to look put-together, I feel more confident, and people respond to that. Just this week, after only two days of doing the style challenge, two people at the grocery store offered to help me just out of the blue (maybe because I looked confused, but I’d like to think it was because I looked cute) and a woman rolled down her car window to tell me she liked my coat. This has been a great reminder that how we show up matters, both in how we experience the day and in how others meet us.
If you’re interested, I shared a longer, more personal reflection on this experience (and how it shaped this guiding principle) over on Substack. I’m also planning to write a longer post about how the Style Challenge has changed the way I plan to get dressed going forward. This challenge has been so eye opening to me and I can’t wait to share my thoughts!
I hope you found a bit of inspiration today…at least my bad day yesterday can hopefully be helpful to you! Thanks so much for reading!
~XOXO Suzanne